Coping Skills & Resilience: Signs You're Making Progress
By Dr. Anil Kapoor • 4/20/2025
Here's a question I want you to sit with for a moment before we dive in: when was the last time you felt genuinely at ease?
What I've Seen Work
This is where things get interesting — and where most generic advice falls short.
I remember my own experience with this vividly. It was a Tuesday — I don't know why I remember that — and I was sitting in my car in a parking lot, unable to go inside the grocery store. Not because of anything dramatic. Just... couldn't do it. If you've been there, you know the feeling.
What's Really Going On
A 2023 meta-analysis in the Journal of Clinical Psychology looked at this exact question. Here's what they found.
The World Health Organization estimates that this affects approximately 1 in 4 people globally at some point in their lives. If you're reading this, the math says several of your close friends are dealing with something similar — they just haven't told you.
The Nuance Nobody Mentions
I want to be careful here because this gets oversimplified a lot.
I remember my own experience with this vividly. It was a Tuesday — I don't know why I remember that — and I was sitting in my car in a parking lot, unable to go inside the grocery store. Not because of anything dramatic. Just... couldn't do it. If you've been there, you know the feeling.
The Practical Part
This is where things get interesting — and where most generic advice falls short.
Okay, here's the toolkit. I'm going to give you five things to try. Not all of them will work for you — that's normal. But if even one or two click, that's a win.
1. Start a "what went okay" log. Not a gratitude journal (those can feel forced when you're struggling). Just write down one thing each day that went okay. The bar is intentionally low.
2. The 5-5-5 rule. When something triggers you, ask: "Will this matter in 5 minutes? 5 months? 5 years?" This isn't about minimizing your feelings. It's about proportioning your response.
3. Move your body for 10 minutes. Not exercise. Movement. Dancing in your kitchen counts. Walking to the mailbox counts. The bar is intentionally low.
4. Name the emotion. Research from UCLA shows that simply labeling an emotion — "I'm feeling anxious" rather than "I feel terrible" — reduces its intensity by up to 50%.
5. Set one boundary this week. It can be small. Leave a conversation that drains you. Say no to one thing. Decline one invitation without an excuse.
Look — I know an article on the internet isn't going to solve everything you're dealing with. But if something in here resonated, that matters. It means you're paying attention to yourself. And that's the first step toward feeling better.
If you're struggling, please don't go through it alone. A therapist, a doctor, a crisis line — these resources exist because this stuff is hard, and nobody should have to figure it out by themselves.